COVID Wedding Etiquette:

When Guests Don’t Feel Safe Attending Your Wedding

Weddings have always been a minefield when it comes to managing relationships with friends and family. Even before the coronavirus pandemic, guest lists and seating charts had to be handled with military precision to make sure nobody feels slighted or left out! Parents have long pressured their children to include old friends and family the couple has never even met on their big day and it is the number one cause of arguments surrounding weddings. In fact, many couples who chose to elope pre-pandemic did so to avoid this type of family drama and politics. Now we are finding ourselves in new territory as COVID wedding etiquette begins to emerge.

At the height of the pandemic, many couples canceled or postponed their plans for a big wedding and we saw an increase in elopements and live streamed ‘Zoom Weddings’. However, gradually as restrictions in some areas have begun to ease some couples are choosing small intimate weddings with tiny guest lists and lots of social distancing. However, if you thought making room for everyone on a 150 person guest list was a challenge then imagine how tough it is when you only have 6 to 10 guest spaces available! This is where COVID wedding etiquette starts to become important.

COVID Wedding Etiquette: Choosing Who to Invite to Your Wedding During a Pandemic

When it comes to filling a very limited guest list for your small wedding, choosing the most important people in your life seems like the best option, right? Your parents, grandparents, siblings? Not necessarily. This may have been the case in 2019, but here in 2021, we need to take COVID Wedding Etiquette into account when making our choices. For example, you may want your parents to share your celebrations, but what if Mom is vulnerable due to her heart condition? Is it appropriate to have her fly in from out of state or is that too big of a risk? Maybe you find it tough to imagine getting married without your best friend by your side – but she lives in Canada and travel restrictions mean she cannot attend. The groom’s sister is an obvious choice, but she is an EMT and is exposed to COVID daily at work. Is it unfair to risk her carrying the virus to your other guests? A whole different set of guest list politics is now in play!

What to Consider When Choosing Your Guests

When it comes to choosing the small number of guests who will be attending your wedding, you may find it useful to consider these questions:

1. Who Do You Want In Attendance?
2. Are those people Healthy Enough to Attend?
3. Who is Able to Travel Without Restriction?
4. Could Anyone Present a Risk to Other Guests?

These questions could help you to reduce your guest list down to the bare minimum who is able to attend. However, is there something else you need to consider? What if your invited guests would prefer NOT to attend?

COVID Wedding Etiquette: Declining an Invite

So what if someone rejects your invitation? If you have spent time agonizing over who to invite, it may seem like a slap in the face to have someone turn down one of those limited invites. However, there should be no guilt or ill-will. Your guests will have to do the same soul searching that you did. Is it safe for them to attend? Would it risk their health or family? Wedding etiquette during a Pandemic calls for grace and understanding.

How are you handling limited guestlists for your small wedding? We would love to hear your tips.