How to React When Someone Elopes!
At WhereToElope.com we love elopements and think that it is the best alternative to a big traditional wedding, but not everybody feels the same way! We think that a lot of the negativity associated with elopement comes down to people not really ‘getting it’. We have talked in the past about elopement etiquette from the point of view of the happy couple, but what about everyone else? This time we want to share some elopement tips aimed at people who have just discovered that their friend or family member is planning on eloping. Let’s talk about elopement reactions!
Remember That an Elopement is Still a Marriage
If someone close to you has just dropped a bombshell and told you that they are planning to elope (or that they already have) then we understand that you might be a little shocked, not to mention upset. This is especially true if you had always thought you would be involved in the big day. In this situation etiquette dictates just one thing – remember these people who you love are still getting married. It doesn’t matter how, when or where a couple decides to exchange vows. What matters is that they are pledging to share their lives with each other forever. Be happy for them!
Do Not Say Something You Might Regret
Again, we understand that you might feel left out or angry, but never say anything that you will come to regret. Hurtful comments from the people we care about most cut deep and will stay with someone for a long time. Regardless of how you might feel right now you should exercise tact and remember that if you can’t say something nice, then it is probably best not to say anything at all.
Don’t Dismiss or Otherwise Downplay The Wedding
Going back to that first point, an elopement is still a wedding. Just because they are not going down the traditional route, doesn’t mean you cannot be excited about the wedding. Talk to them about their plans and maybe even suggest they still have a bridal shower, engagement or small celebration after. This wedding is still a big deal to them, even if they are forgoing the usual festivities!
Be Supportive In Your Elopement Reactions
If you are upset about the couple’s plans to elope then take a moment to ask yourself why? There is a good chance that your reasons are selfish ones like you wanted to be a bridesmaid or you had hoped to throw a big family get together. Try to take a step back and see their side of things. Be supportive, but don’t stick your nose in!
Don’t Assume The Worst
Last, but by no means least – when someone announces that they are going to be eloping do not assume the worst. It doesn’t mean they are rushing to marry because of an unplanned pregnancy or for some other reason. People choose elopement for many different reasons and most of them just come down to the couple wanting a low key celebration. It is really none of your business why elopement is the way that they are choosing to go, but in most cases if you ask them in a respectful way then they will be only too happy to explain.